I’m a little bit embarrassed to admit it but I have control issues. I like to be in control of my life. That’s fine when I’m on my own. It doesn’t work so well when I’m in a relationship. I tend to get too focused on what’s going on in my partner’s life. I end up trying to control it. It’s never a good thing. I’m slowly learning how to stop doing this.

The main thing that helps me to relinquish control over my partner is to recognize when something in his life has nothing to do with mine. For example, a boyfriend of mine started taking human growth hormone for its anti-aging benefits. I didn’t think he had any problems with aging and I thought it was ridiculous for him to take hgh supplements. What I eventually realized was that whether or not he takes them is none of my business; it has nothing to do with me.

Whenever I start to get too focused on my partner, I try to remind myself to put my eyes back on my own paper. In other words, I try to re-focus on what’s going on in my individual life. This helps me to avoid trying to control the other person’s behavior. It seems to be making my relationships a lot better although I still have a long way to go before I really know how to use this skill.